Tuesday, July 19, 2011

I have been thinking a lot lately about the secrets that people keep. I’m not necessarily talking about dirty, sex secrets or hidden family secrets of times past. I guess I am more talking about the things that are going on in our lives that we don’t want other people to know, or don’t feel comfortable sharing.

Then I was thinking about how odd it is that we can sit next to some stranger on a bus or train and share some random piece of information about ourselves but we don’t/won’t share things with our close friends.

Then of course my thoughts brought it home to me and I started to think what things I share with what people and why. I think I’m a pretty open person, and at some point I will probably tell you something about myself that you don’t even want to know. But there are things that I just don’t feel comfortable sharing with even my closest friends. Heck, there are some things I’m scared to share with Eric.

Sometimes I feel like all I talk about on this blog is, sad whoa is me stuff. And I never mean to share just the bad things, but it does seem to work out that when I’m struggling with something, I use this as an outlet to get my feelings out.

I have an ongoing health thing(not fatal)…and I’m not going into details…and if you ask me about it in person, I probably won’t want to talk about it…but I need prayers/good thoughts/whatever sent my way. I’m honestly starting to lose hope that this health issue will ever be resolved and it is getting to me.

And the hard part is, there doesn’t seem to be anyone that can help. There are doctors that are hoping to help, but there is no guarantee and I don’t know what I’m going to do.

I  feel broken, and alone. And there is not enough tape or glue in the world to put me back together.

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